I don't hate Macs - I hate arrogant Mac users

I was logging on my facebook to look for a MAC group so that I can join their forum to discuss and troubleshoot.
And I found this..

"I don't hate Macs - I hate arrogant Mac users"

Which has a wooping figure of 3700 over members...
MORE than all the mac users groups members in facebook...


I laughed.

Because i am guilty.
Maybe we are over zealous and too pleased with OUR machine.
I do understand how it feels...when MAC users are full of praise for their machines...
And tell everybody about their MAC...
But if you think about it...
there must be a reason for MAC users to be proud of their MAC...

I used to be a PC user.
I love my NEC laptop.
I can't live without it most of the time.
But curse it all the time as well.
Existing window users out there should know the feeling.
And I avoid at all cost not to use another MS product again...
If I can.
Including the new VISTA.
That is why i choose my MAC now
after very serious consideration.
Nothing to do with the ipod or iphone hype...
Or the sleek design.
It is the function.
And my precious working time.
And the fact that every new laptop in the market comes with VISTA
except MAC.

M choice becomes CLEAR.

By the way...did I mention...the other group I found on facebook?

It was 4311 members.

And its called

"Vista SUCKS!".

Tricks I learn about my Mac these few days...

If you are a window user and do not intend to convert to MAC...you may ignore this post as it has got NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.

However, if you are tempted to crossover and want to learn more...OR are a Mac user READ ON.

Tricks I have learn on my MAC so far.....


1. HOw to Delete irritating, stubborn and Haunting Win EXE files...such as desktop.ini. thumbs.db ..etc from you MAC...To Cleanse yourself off your WINDOW past.

First of all, if you have already totally convert and become a MAC user, it is pointless to keep some of the files that are in your imported files...most of them are in you music and photo files.
Mainly desktop.ini and thumbs.db....and .exe...etc.

You need to take note of whether your imported files are locked. If so, there will be a little lock shown on the left corner of the file icon. You have to right click or CTRL click to to call up the "Get Info" and uncheck the "Lock" section.

Sometimes, your files are multi-layered...so..even if the existingt file is unlocked...the upper layer file may be locked to stop you from edit and make changes.So you may need to trace up the files to make sure all are unlock to have full rights to edit.

If you wanna WIPE OUT ALL the similar window files...you may search for them on your spotlight to call all the files up and delete at one go instead of searching into files for them.


2. How to access the actual file from iphoto...

Visible files inside your photo file but NOT inside the iphoto file ARE DUPLICATES!...and it takes up SPACES in your MAC!

Also, you may want to access your iphoto file when you wanna upload files from your iphoto.

Go to FINDER--->ADMINSTRATOR FILE---->PICTURE----->iPHOTO(CTRL click)----->SHOW PACKAGE CONTENT---->Should bring you into your iphoto photo files.



3. What is Time Machine about....

YOU GOT TO HAVE AN EXTERNAL HD in the first place to activate.
Plug in your external HD and follow instruction from you Time Machine.
Double click yor time machine icon to call up the application. Easy easy.


4. YOU CAN RIGHT CLICK! Like using PC....no diff!

Just plug in your mouse. SERIOUS!



5. How to IMPORT or EXPORT bookmarks between SAFARI and FIREFOX.

Just click and drag...and I mean it. GO TRY!


Some discovery.....

I realise my iphoto is the culprit who exhausted my HD capacity.
Because I always thought they are accessng my photo files directly.
However, it is actually importing and duplicating them.
Hence doubling everything I have.

Same thing goes to my music file.

My photo files of 35GB plus becomes 80GB
And my music of only 10GB become 20GB.

With this...100plus GB , more than 50% of my HD is GONE!

This is alarming!

And I m thinking of getting a 500GB backup now.

SCARY!

So take note and beware!

Osaka style?!

I did nothing while I was in Osaka except for walking.
I walked all the way from Namda to Umeda from 12pm till 7pm.
Carrying a near 10kg bag.
And these are the few things that caught my eyes...
And this is not common in other parts of Japan that I have been to...
Except for osaka.

OSAKA!

Resizing and retouching....

I need to resize my photo into passport size...
But unfortunately my iphoto couldn't do the trick.
I understand I am asking too much from Apple to produce a photo management software with editing capability.
But I secretly wished it has.
That is why I am disappointed.

And so, iPHOTO CANNOT RESIZE YOUR PHOTOS!

Meanwhile,

I am amused by the retouching tools.

AMUSED AND AMAZED!

I was editing the lighting of my passport photo..and saw this tool at the bottom of the editing window...that says "Click or drag over blemish to remove..."
I was curious...and click it over my blemish...

And the effect is one word....

WOW

Neo Office!!!!

This post is dedicated to the developers of Neo Office.

I want say, this software is GREAT!
Good enough for my word processing needs.
Most importantly...
it opens my microsoft word file on my MAC flawlessly.
And also other format such as rtf and odt.

Compatibility RULES in CYBERWORLD!

WELL DONE!

Somewhere in Japan...

This is one of those pictures that I anyhow take and did not expect that it will look that good.
And I got no idea where and when I took it.

How come we don't have this in Singapore?

This was the toilet bowl I use in my dormitory common toilet when I was in Tokyo.
Simple, smart, save space and environmentally friendly.
This design has outshine the thrill I got when i saw the toilet bowl that cleans butts at the airport.

ill-fated part 1

The japanese believe that if you pick a bad fortune...you tie it on the poles provided in the temple....


By the way that one tied above was mine...because of below...


How can anything be worse than this....?

ill-fated part 2

The japanese believe if you pick a BAD fortune lot,
you tie it at the pole to ward off your bad fortune...blah blah...I am just repeating for your information...

Not convince of my ill-fate, I draw another lot on a seperate day...

It ended up on the pole again....and why???

I hope this explain why.
"How can anything be worse than this??"...
Well...this one may not be worse, but no better either.

BUT I SHALL NEVER SAY DIE!

Please Do WHAT??! at the beach???

If you don't understand what this poster mean...you may ask me.
Or go tokyo and see for yourself why there is a need for this.

六本木

The legendary Dali's sculpture in Roppongi in night scape.

下北沢

This is the best kept secret in Japan.

Love, hate and learn.

I was blogging halfway...and my firefox crash.
Not my MAC.
It appears that the new firefox is not that stable on MAC yet

Anyway, i was typing chunks per category just now..and too lazy to repeat now...
so i will just summerize the category...and add on if i am still in the mood to.

Love

1. DOCK!

2. DASHBOARD!

3. STICKIES!

4. MAGNET POWER PLUG!

5. DICTIONARY!

6. APPEARANCE!

7. MULTILINGUAL

8. ZOOM-IN




HATE

1. MSN

2. WORD

3.LOST IN TRANSLATION

4.WMA vs iTUNE

5. DIMMER!

6. All else NON-APPLE act weirdly on it..including firefox.


LEARN

1. The function of Swift, Control & Command

2. Change USER NAME. IMPT!

3. Switch off display dimmer.

4. Make my Mac read and write chinese.

5. Force Quit. YOU WILL NEED THIS IF YOU OWN A MAC.

6. What can Dashboard do and what widgets are.

7. How Stickies works.

8. Correct way to install App

9. How to switch on touch pad click function.

10. How to switch on ZOOM-IN function.

11. Short key for various monitor control on keyboard.



And finally.. things that I still have YET to figure out and WILL find out are...

1. TIME MACHINE.

2. How to get Adobe Master collection...and WORD for my MAC.


And that's all for now.
Meanwhile...maybe I should switch back to safari....
But I like firefox.

:(

My lovely Mac...

Well...despite the numerous problem I encounter with my MAC...
I am willing to accept and adapt.
Because ...I CHOOSE TO.

As if I am marrying someone of my own choice...
I just have to bear with it...at least for the next 4 years.
To close one eye is really the trick...
And maybe love may blossom..
If you know what I mean.
Time is only what I need.

And since this is my own choice...
An expensive one...

I reckon I should make the most out of it.

In the process, it turn out, I am happy.

Because I learn new things with my MAC everyday...
Just like how I start to learn from scratch with my NEC.
The experience is energizing.
And something to look forward to.


Ahh....what am i saying...who am I kidding?
I am pissed!...MSN is so lousy on my MAC.
Not anyone's fault...
except for the fact that I already knew this before I buy.
Still Pissed! Can't help. Sorry.

Oh...but i kind of like the dashboard.
Not on the first day though...I was a complete idiot then.
But after one day of exploration...I am proud to figure out some interesting features.

I will describe that in my next post to expand my post figures.
Ciao!

My New Darling...

My mac arrive unexpectedly this afternoon while I am still struggling to decide if i should wake up or not.

It ended up sitting on the floor for hours until I clear my table at night to set it up.

It was a struggle.

Just a little bit.

Compare to 5 years ago when I first got my NEC and is a COMPLETE DUMMY with computers...

This is consider a breeze. However, I swear...it is really not as easy as it sound on the commercial and whichever guide book that lure you to buy a mac...

It still takes time and effort to figure out what is going on for a new laptop.

So far...I have learn that...

1. Dock for Apple = Taskbar for PC

2. Msn on Mac is IRRITATING...and hang my computer everytime!

3. Somehow my external hard disk can only be read and copy...but cannot edit and delete.

4. As foreseen earlier on, I still don't know what to do with my Word file.

5. WMA files problems are solved.

6. You can Magnify you webpage with short key...which is FUN!

7. My itune still cannot read chinese and korean yet.

8. YOU BETTER THINK CAREFULLY what you want for your shortname when you first register you computer, as there is actuall no way to change it. Unless you remove the account and set another up. I got my shortname ok...but damn my user name...it is fixed now.

9. Power plug design is EXACTLY what I needed...I trip and fall years ago and crash my laptop.

10. Control, Click on the application to FORCE QUIT! I learn this to force quite my MSN.

Ad so you see....all else seems ok except for all other things that is related to MICROSOFT.

 

And I really like those bouncing icons on the Dock.

Oh well...

So far for now...while i go figure out how to teach my MAc read and write chinese.

By the way...THIS IS THE FIRST POST I WRITE WITH MY MAC.

 

Foreseen circumstances...

I bought my MAc knowing it will not be perfect.

And before I even receive my shipment, I am face with 2 potentialy problem to deal with.

1. Mac is NOT wma literate.

I have hundreds of songs in wma format.
And do I have to elaborate why it will become a problem soon?
Yes, my mac will not be able to read it.
And after some research I found 3 brilliant solutions.

One, convert my wma on a pc with itunes or SWITCH before i export into my mac.
Two, Download SWITCH with my MAc.
Three, Get Windows for my Mac.
Four....Refund my Mac and buy a PC...nah kidding.


2. I have some important work related stuff that i need to do with Microsoft Words.

And needless to say, yes...I have compatibility problem again.
So far...I believe I can solve it by 3 ways as well.

One, Buy Ms Word for MAc.
Two, Pirate Ms Word for Mac.
Three, PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE A SOLUTION.

Well....

NOTHING IS PERFECT.

Nothing.

Things that i say I wanna do and have done it.

1. BUY A NEW LAPTOP.

Yeah!

2. Switch to Mac.

Yeah! yeah! One stone kill two birds.

3. Go Japan!

This is a dream since secondary school.
Been there and done that.

Things that I say I wanna do but never do it...YET.

1. Cut my hair.

I am sure most of you out there would have nod your head without hesitation to show that you have heard of me saying "I am going to cut my hair soon", somewhere or sometime, some of you for years in fact. And true enough, I have lost count of how many of you out there actually are being informed of my big plan. Yet, no sign of me chopping them off. Be patient. As I have promised myself....by end of this year.


2. Go swimming.

I love water. And I always say I wanna go swimming. But I realise...the last time i jump into a pool was last year, not including the bathing pool I was soaking in while I was in Japan at the public bath. And furthermore, I was not swimming then, I was just soaking water. And so, Yes...I will go swimming soon.


3. Publish my book and set up a website.

Maybe not all of you out there know about this, but I am sure some of you might have impression of me saying so. I always wanted to publish a book about myself. And that is as long as me saying I want to cut my hair. I actually have a feeling that I will publish my book as soon as I cut myhair. Same goes my website.

4. Buy a new laptop.

As much as I am unwilling to part with my old NEC. I have done it!
And a new darling is on the way. With this, I believe my life will make significant change.
I will schedule my hair to be cut, as I am able to do video editing soon and make a video about my hair being cut. And also, will be designing my book and finally put up my website.
As for the swim, I am just plain lazy....hmmm...how about tommorow?

Waiting for the arrival of my ipod and mac book pro...

While I am patiently waiting for the arrival of my new toys...
I diligently prepare myself for them.
I borrowed books and read up article about my new toys...
And make plans on how I am going to fully utilise them.

As my big plans goes...
I will set up my website.
Upload my photos..
Do my videos and book...on my mac book pro...
And play great library of music on my ipod...

I am so delighted...
And how I look forward...

:)

My Anger.

Although I know no matter how pissed and angry I am...
There is no way I can get them back.

But I would still like to express my anger to the fact that...

MY NANNY THROW AWAY THE WHOLE BAG OF MY COLLECTION OF PAPER AND PLASTIC BAGS WHEN I WAS AWAY>>>WITHOUT MY PERMISSION, DESPITE THE FACT THAT I HAVE WARN HER BEFORE I LEFT NOT TO THROW AWAY ANYTHING FROM MY ROOM.

THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME, AND WILL NOT BE THE LAST.

The big chulky loads full of bags may look like trash but there are a couple of interesting paper bags I keep for creative references...

I AM REALLY PISSED!
UNTIL NOW.

Because, every now and then when I want to look for a nice paper bag to put my stuff now...
I am reminded of how they are ruthlessly being dump!

GRRRRR......PISSED!

Waiting...

Life without a computer is painful.
And I have to sneakingly use someone else's computer without permission.
I am guilty but can't help it.

Meanwhile...I am waiting for the arrival of my new laptop...which is on the way.

How I look forward...

Dobutsuen mae.

Repeat after me...
Doe-bu-zi-yen ma-eh...
The email regarding my stay in Hotel Mikado...
says...2mins walk from Dobutsuen mae station.

And it means..."In front of the zoo".
I did not realise that until I saw the translation on the railway signboard.
Thanks.

Yes...I live in the zoo zoo zoo...
How about you you you??

2 mins from in front of the zoo..is not a ZOO.
It is my hotel Mikado which cost 2300 yen.
And along the road...I saw many other way CHEAPER HOTELS!
1500 yen....1800yen...
DAMN...
Hotel Mikado better be GREAT or I will be ANGRY!


By the way...it is a HOTEL not a Hostel
And so I thought I should enjoy my rights to the fullest...
Since i paid 2300yen for it.
First thing first, I had a room all to myself.
GOOD.

Then, I went to the public bath...
I did not know it was public when I was at the door...
I mean..when I open the door...
And I saw naked women bathing....
WAT!!!??
I closed the door.
Open again...
And closed.
Hmmm...I need to bath.
Means I need to strip.
And it took my a few seconds to think...
And I cannot think for a while...
Finally...I went in , in my birthday suit...
And start my unusual experience of a traditional japanese public bath...
ok...this part...please see the post below below....

And other facilities include TV,
TOWEL and bathrobes....toothbrushs...slippers...internet access..
and free flow of VIDEO TAPES...
And extinct form of media to Singaporean.
And yes...THERE ARE PLENTY OF PORNS...
And also other movies..
However, you will not know what you are watching...
becos all titles are in Japanese...
even the english show...have japanese title.
So i "dikum" and pick 4...
And guess what, 2 is porn, one is retro looking english film,
and one is korean HORROR...
just my luck...or maybe not so...I know the tape looks fishy...
Oh well...
Watch some local TV shows instead...SMAP xSMAP..
And Kimura is gettig old...i can see.

I haven't been to anywhere in Osaka yet as I only arrive here at 9m and all shops are closed.
But having public bath and videos...is interesting enough for me.

So much of Osaka for now.

Lights off...and go to bed.

Travel slowly...

I love to travel slowly.
Maybe becos I am a slow person.
I need time to REACT and RESPOND.

And this trip is a tiny bit too fast.
I am so tired every night...
And have no time to reflect and respond...
Before I knock out.

Legs are in pain...becos of the 8 hours walk everyday.
I can feel the muscles around my legs...
I reckon I lost weight, but it was not shown in the weighing machine last night.
It must be the muscles...haha
Though my belt did tighten a gap.

I am obviously tanner...
The sun is scorching...
And I need umbrella in bright sunny days...
The brolly is for the rain in Tokyo...but the sun in Kyoto.

I wasn't feeling hungry for a long while...and do not eat much.
I was plain tired.

However, I feel, I probably can do something about my life and travel.
Maybe travel professionally...and share my experience.
And earn money...

All I need...

I have to travel more slowly that is...

Fushimi Inari Shrine

This is a visitor's advice.
Try not to go AFTER 5pm.

The travel guide says it open all day, no admission restriction.
And best to go at dusk.
True enough, sunset was lovely.
I saw the sun setting on my way UP!
you know what...
It means...it is dark now..
And I was not even halfway!
HELL!

Can you imagine you are the only person in the mountains after sunset...
It feels like the path is never ending...
You just walk and walk...
Occasionally you cross path with other people...briefly..
The freaky thing is...after the 4km walk around the mountain...
There are tiny shrine along the way where there are vending machines...
But no other human beings..
There are a lot of cats though...
And they look at you while you are walking along the paths...
I was lead into some quiet path...almost without any lights..
And I wonder if I am lost.
All signpost are in Japanese.
WHY?!!?
Don't they know there are many tourist as well!
By the way, the path is a loop and no one is suppose to be lost
if you keep walking...
But there are many 2 ways..where you have to choose...
and you will wonder if it will bring you back...or further down...

Finally...i find my way...out..
into some residential area...
And finally...saw PEOPLE...
I ask my way around and finally find my way out!!!!

It was an interesting walk...
But if there ever is a next time...
I will start early.
Perhaps at 3pm...and stop on my way down to enjoy the sunset.
And yes, those gates...are SPECTACULAR!

Cultural shock...

I think I have travelled too much to feel shock about Japanese culture...
Moreover, Japan is not a totally foreign land to me...
Too much familiarity...the food the language...

However,
there is just ONE thing yesterday night that shock me.
THE PUBLIC BATH.
YES.
PUBLIC.
ok...it is all women bath.
But still...it is weird to see NAKED WOMEN walking around the bath...
and even weirder...
TO BE WALKING AROUND NAKED.

I just cant help but want to take a second look...
Although it is not as if I have never seen my own naked body...
But, it is somebody elses body.
And they are different.
It is simply surreal.

And to be honest...
Slightly uncomfortable mentally.
The fact that I can see them naked means they see me NAKED too.

But the hot suana atmosphere and a warm pool bath is relaxing and fun.
And feels squeaky clean after the whole ritual.

Something to think about it.
The whole idea of a public bath.

One week later...

Japan is getting interesting for me.
But I am too tired to blog every night.

There are a few freak raining days a few days ago..
But this two day is lovely good sunny days with blue blue blue skies...

Legs are in pain everyday...because these 7 days...
is probably the most walking I have ever done in my whole life so far.
I walk up to 8 hours a day!!!!!


So far, the best place...is SHIMO KITAZAWA!
My favourite!

And not to forget Tsukiji....

Ginza is BORING!
Shibuya is culture shocking at the road junction but fun fun fun...

Went to a flea market but was closed due to the rain...
My biggest disappointment.
Followed by the Ghibli Museum which I did not have a ticket to enter...
becos you need to buy tickets in advance before you go.
You can't get tickets when you are there.
My second biggest disappointment.

Lots of expensive stuff...
Lots of cheap stuff as well...

I am very please with my artwork.
I would consider it successful in terms of expression and execution.
But the gallery is quite a remote place...not mant people came.
However, a lot of my hostel friends came!

Wait till I am back to Singapore to blog...
will show more photos!!!!
BUT BUT BUT...
I NEED A LAPTOP!

SHIT!


I have to buy one soon!


Love love love to everyone!

2nd day...

This is my 2nd day in Tokyo.
Good and bad...
Good...from tiny surprises...
Bad...from too much anticipation.

First day is horrible.
Mainly because of the rain.
Dun get me wrong, I love the rain...
But the rain stop me from taking some interesting pictures...
And my legs are too tired to walk me further.

TOKYO!

I reached Tokyo at 6.14am.
Board the 7.30am train.
Forgot to transfer to an express train...
Stuck in a slow local NON-express train ride....
Reach UENO station at 9.45am.
Wasted some time at the travel information counter for plenty of free brochures...
I SHOULD HAVE LEAVE MY GUIDE BOOKS AT HOME!
THEY ARE DAMN HEAVY!
Anyway...struggle with my 20kg backpack to walk 150m linkway from UENO to HIBIYA line...
2 stops to MINOWA.
Where I alight...and walked past 5 traffice lights(which is hell long...)
And finally reach my hostel.
BaKPaK Tokyo Hostel.

Check in.
And use the free internet service right NOW!

Meeting YQ at Senso-ji, 1pm,

Meanwhile...I felt like sleeping.

Btw, Thai airway has horrible in-flight TV program.
Horrible Horrible.
As in BAD, not scary.

I was mistaken as a japanese at least twice today.
Not a good thing when people assume you know when you actually don' know.
If you know what I mean.

That's all for now.

I almost did!

I plan to cut my hair today actually.
Until my big brother made a comment that I decided to postpone.

He said..."You will be special when u reach japan.."

And so...I found another excess to eep my hair..

Actually...I am special ANYWHERE I go...with this length...

But I really intend to cut it soon..

I SWEAR!

One more!

ZJ...this is your MUM and me!

Don't show her my blog leh...haha...save the pic and show her ;p

My way...

Now you see it...
Now you don't!

Blood thirsty!

REST IN PEACE!

Haig Girls...

FIR concert, 2008, 8th August , 8pm

Faye...in her lovely white gown....
Special Guest...Xiao Jing Teng!

National Day Gathering at Red Star!

My personal favourite for that day is actually the egg tart which is not in the picture...
Because I am too busy eating...

The last time I cut my hair...

东风破

These 2 particular phrases is my favourite from 方文山's 东风破.

" 一壶漂泊浪迹天涯难入喉 你走之後酒暖回忆思念瘦 "

Due to the fact that my computer cannot type chinese..
I can only cut and paste the content.
I really like the subtle comparison of wandering life to wine that is hard to swallow...

Great lyrics.

青花瓷

词:方文山曲:周杰伦
素胚勾勒出青花笔锋浓转淡
瓶身描绘的牡丹一如你初妆
冉冉檀香透过窗心事我了然
宣纸上走笔至此搁一半

釉色渲染仕女图韵味被私藏
而你嫣然的一笑如含苞待放
你的美一缕飘散去到我去不了的地方

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
炊烟袅袅升起隔江千万里
在瓶底书汉隶仿前朝的飘逸
就当我为遇见你伏笔

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
月色被打捞起晕开了结局
如传世的青花瓷自顾自美丽你眼带笑意

色白花青的锦鲤跃然於碗底
临摹宋体落款时却惦记著你
你隐藏在窑烧里千年的秘密
极细腻犹如绣花针落地
帘外芭蕉惹骤雨门环惹铜绿
而我路过那江南小镇惹了你
在泼墨山水画里你从墨色深处被隐去

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
炊烟袅袅升起隔江千万里
在瓶底书汉隶仿前朝的飘逸
就当我为遇见你伏笔

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
月色被打捞起晕开了结局
如传世的青花瓷自顾自美丽你眼带笑意

If I win the 8 Million TOTO...

I dun remember what I had wanted in the past during my lottery fantasies...

But I guess they are more or less the same...except for during the period during my depression in UK...where I simply want to go home if i win the lottery.

Here goes the list.

1. Confirm and bank in my winnings .

And below in no particular order of preference.

1. Buy a house in Singapore and Thailand for my parents.
2. Bring my parents to travel.
3. Go travel myself! Dive dive dive!
4. Buy my own house.
5. Set up my studio with facilities and equipments and materials.
6. Have a nice well equipped kitchen.
7. Have a library of all the books I like.
8. Learn Yoga, tango, music, caligraphy, ikebana, ceramics, ....
9. Publish my books...write books and travel journals...
10. Do plenty of art works and have plenty of exhibitions.
11. Do charity.
12. open a cafe gallery and art space.
13. Invest.
14. Invite all my friends for dinners and KTV.

That's all.
I am happy and contented.
As for husband and kids...
I will leave that to fate.

2008, August, 8th, 8 MILLION!

8888888!
The chinese love the number 8.
And today is the big day.
Probably the day most chinese are getting married.
And for Singaporean, today is also the day for the BIG 8MILLION TOTO DRAW.

And so as always...
I will throw myself in a pool of fantasy to think about what if I win the draw.
As always...I will enjoy fantasizing until the result is announced.
I do not mind not winning...
Because the process of fantasizing is entertaining enough.

I cut my hair...

in my dream.
I dream of myself cutting my hair again.
I had this kind of dream many times...
and each time...there are different scenerio and emotions.
There are time where I will feel so much hurt and regrets that
i will cry and cry over my cut hair...
While there are times where I am happy and cheerful after cutting.
This time...I am simply puzzled.
I look into the mirro wondering if I am dreaming...in my dream..
that I have cut my hair...
until it was so real that I was convinced that it was cut off...
Suddenly...it became long again in african plait...
and then I realise I was dreaming....

As far as I can remember...the hairstyle was very short...
and I had a hard time taming my hair.
But I did enjoy the part I had some fringe on my forehead...

Oh well...
It is only a matter of time I cut my hair...
Just wonder what kind of hairstyle.

2nd August 1998

was the last time I cut my hair.

Plan B

Is to go Holland to do my MFA.
But...honestly..
I am also tempted to go Taiwan or Thailand to practice.

Give up stability to practice.

I am still thinking.

Seriously.

Plan A

Is gone.
My plan A was set 8 years ago.
Or even earlier...probably 10 years ago.
My plan is to get the scholarship from JCCI to go tokyo for my MFA.
Be a part time lecturer in some tertiary school...
Practice full time as an artist.

But eversince 2 month ago...Plan A is gone.
I am quite lost actually.
I need to rethink my future.
I activated my Plan B.
Plan B...

I am 28 now.

Time is running out.
For my art practice.
I need to establish myself before I reach 35.
Before I can start my stable life as an artist.
If I settle for stability now, it could mean compromising my art.
I have to give up my stable now...
So that art can be with me for the rest of my life...
with a stable life.

If i practice now...with my BA...
my part time will be low paid..
And my work will not be well funded.
And I have to struggle...and
cannot make both ends meet.

If i finish my MFA,
my part time will be better paid...
and my work will have a higher chances of getting funded.
Until I am independent and
finally practice full time eventually.

What I want is really simple.
Find someone I love who also love me...
to live the rest of my life with...
have a place I call home to live and work in...
have many kids...
share my life in the form of art...
Do what I love and make a living out of it...until I die.

Maybe...not so simple afterall.

Let go ...and grab it...

I am aware that I am feeling very uncertain about my future.
And I am also aware that there is something really HUGE that has been stopping me to express.
I am too careful.
I am afraid.
I am afraid that I will end up with nothing.
While I am trying very hard to stretch out my hand for my artistic expression....
Yet, holding on to stability with the other hand...
In the end...I always only can see but cannot reach art...
When I couldn't let go of stability.

I have to let go...
And grab it.

Every now and then...

I redefine my past all the time.
Because I grow and learn new things.
Because I begin to understand things that I do not understand in the past.

I redefine my love history as something I cannot avoid.
Although it is my greatest mistake for making such choices,
I cannot say I regret it.

You love because you love.
Even if you know there is no future.
At that moment, there is no need for future.

What is right before your eyes is the truth at that moment of time...
And afterwhich, it will become a past...
to be remembered if worth remembering...
And will make you what you are in the future.
If you only see the future...
Then your future will be a result of your meaningless past...
which will be meaningless as a future.
Nothing for you to look back on..
Always overlooking what is right before you.

Have you overlook your present.
Have you missed out what is right before your eyes now?

Look around around you now.

This is joyce.

She is my student.
She is an artist.
Her work is expressive and powerful.
Not only visually...but also physically.
She produces her artwork with fast and hard brushstrokes...
often with a lot of strength...(spoiling the markers tips)
Her subject matters are wild, random and full of imagination!
Her work may look messy and unconventional.
But every bit a masterpiece!
And I love it!

Juicy..!

Have not painted still life for a long time...
was so tempted to paint one last week...
that I join in the fun and painted this.
I am happy.

Erm...

Seriously talented girls - Haig Girls.

Comic drawing exercise.

Look...I am serious when I say they can't spell my name.

By the way...thanks girls!

I think my students love me...but somehow...

They always spell my name wrongly..?!??!

100種生活 Lyrics.

100種生活
作詞:鍾成虎 作曲:盧廣仲

整個世界 停止 不轉動 很寂寞
走在海邊 數著 螢火蟲 好困惑
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
不想掉進這深深 漩渦

整個海洋 擺動 柔軟地 舉起我
孤獨給我 自由 猶豫得 好感動
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
該怎麼走 誰來告訴我 wow

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我要的生活

整個海洋 擺動 柔軟地 舉起我
孤獨給我 自由 猶豫得 好感動
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
該怎麼走 誰來告訴我 wow

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我(想)要的生活

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我要的生活
原來一百分之一
要在很久很久以後才會懂

盧廣仲 100種生活

This guy...he decided to pick up his guitar to start singing after a traffic accident.
Maybe in life, you have to be brave enough to embrace passion..
Or you might just die in regrets.

For me, I am simply too afraid that being a full time artist will earn myself nothing.
Hence I am nowhere...hanging on as a part time artist...
Yet, did not achieve anything....in my art practice and my career.

If I can be brave enough to choose and do something totally...
WITHOUT REGRETS.

Maybe I should give up something altogether and do something totally.

If I am brave enough like him.
Maybe I can create something as beautiful as this song like him.

Meanwhile, ENJOY THIS SONG.
A GREAT SONG!

Youtube below!

盧廣仲 100種生活-ON REPEAT MODE NOW!

The place call home.

It has become very clear to me where is home for me now.
Home is where I feel the most comfortable, most relax and safe.
Home is where I do not feel restricted.
And be myself.

Singapore is the place I grew up in with many friends and memory.
However, that home with my parents in it...
is the only place I feel safe and relax...without restriction.

This place that I am staying in now in Singapore...
is my temporary home...
As comfortable as I try to make myself feel...
I still always do not feel totally comfortable.
And somehow on many occassion...
I was being reminded that this is not my own home.

My home now...is the home where my parents are staying now in Chiang Mai.
Not Thailand.
But that home.
The home with my family around.

That is my home.
Nowadays...I will tell my friend..."I am going home.."
when I am going "back" to Chiang Mai...

That kind of feeling..
If you know what I mean.

But then...
I am always proud to be a Singaporean.

A singaporean who is proud to be one...
But no longer feels at home.

Sadly.

This thing call friendship.

I realise...

Different kind of friends play different role in your life.
While u play different role to your friends' lives.


Some friends...are those you call up every few days...to update your life.
Since they already know what is going on in your life.
Or Even if there is nothing going on in your life...
However, if there is a lagged in updating information or delay for too long.
Interaction level will drop if communication is always initiated one-sidedly.


Some friends...are those...you see once in a while...
or some... once in a blue moon.
Yet, it seems perfectly alright to you.
You just need to catch up and move on.


Some friends, you just know they will call you.
And you don't have to call them.
However, if they do not call you,
you will only call them when you remember to.


Some friends, you will only remember when you meet them in gatherings.
And the next meeting is the next wedding dinner perhaps.

Some, are those you can call in the middle of the night at 3am and they will not get angry...

Some, strangely likes to calls you at 12 midnight...

Some, are those who share the same taste as you when it comes to watching movies.

Some, you will not want to travel with though they are your good friends.

Some, share most of the mahjong session of your life.

Some, are your best KTV mates.

Some, are good to go shopping with.

Some, likes the same kind of food.

Some, goes to the late night weekend sales with you...

Some, wake up early in the morning and go to the library sales with you...

Some, always meet you at Kinokuniya...

Some, you talk to them about politics...

Some, you share your dreams...

Some, you pour your woes....

Some, you share your philosophy in life...

Some, you talk about man....

Some, you may want to keep a distance because you are afraid of getting hurt .

Some, keep a distance from you, because they do not want to hurt you.

Some, automatically drift away because of time and distance.

Some, will always buy you something when they go abroad...

Some, will remember your birthday.

Some, you are just contented not to keep in contact until you have to.

Some, if you do not keep in contact, you will lose them.

Some, will correct your grammar mistakes...

Some, like to point out your typo.

Some, are those who have known you for more than half of you life so far...

Some, reads your blog...

Some, did not know you have a blog...

Some, simply understand why you like to watch K-drama...

Some, have been waiting for you to cut your hair for a long long time ...


Which one are you?

You play the role you play as a friend.

I was complaining to RS about my best friend, YH.
As usual, I was complaining that I am being neglected since she get married.
Then RS said..."you also never call me when I was abroad."
Yes, I dun have the habit to call RS as she will call me most of the time.

And so...I realise....

Different friends fill up different aspect of your life.

YH is never the person to call me
but the one always there waiting for my call.
And the reason for me feeling neglected was due to the fact that
I feel bad disturbing her new found married life...
and stop calling her.

So it was not her fault.

It was mine.

So, I sent her an sms.

And she replied.

:)

I like my current job.

Yes, the time flexibity and reasonably pay...
Is one of the reason why I like my current job.
But the most satisfying of all....
Are my students.
I am teaching them to grow up.
While they teach me to be like a child again.

I am thankful.

Pissed.

As always...I am pissed helping people who take me for granted.
I don't want to say who.
They probably don't know they are.
That is the scary part.

Buddha forbids.
Arh mi tuo fu.

The annual library book sales!

Opps...forget to take photos.
Too busy to.
Bought 15 books altogether.
$2 each :)
But felt guilty.
Afterall, I only want to read them, with no intention to keep some of them.
But...I always end up with a lot of overdue books without reading them.
That is why i decided to buy.
I hope I can finish reading some of them...and gave them away after reading.

Maybe, I did try my best.

I have been thinking if I am capable of stopping myself
from falling in love with someone
whom I know will hurt me.
Maybe, I did try my best back then.
But I failed.
Because, I am me.

Even if I was given the same scenario ...
Knowing I will be hurt...
I probably will still choose to love him...
But maybe in a different way.
I will keep my distance and love him quietly.

This is just me.
I am just silly.

Boys! They love machines! Part 3

This time round.
His job is to draw trees that looks like a palm.
Once again, this good boy drew as he was instructed.
He came and ask me if he can draw someone chopping off the tree.
With plenty of his own creative initiative, as always.
I give him my consent.
And he drew the robot to do the job.
WELL DONE! DOUGLAS!

Boys! They love machines! Part 2

This time, Doug was instructed to draw mice.
I wanted at least 2 mice.
He did.
One of them is a robot one.
And they are fighting.
Nice one!

Boys! They love machines! Part 1

Douglas, my primary one student.
He was suppose to draw a dog.
And he did.
But he added a tank!
Attacking the poor dog.
Good try!

Some memories.

Talking to RS lately remind me of my past.
So many...too many.
There were times that I was happy.
There were times...I was sad.

I claimed that I have get over him long ago.
But the scar will always be there.
It is not painful anymore.
But it reminded me of how painful it was.

While giving advice to relationship matters now...
I can only say...
Leave it as it is...at it's best.
And not overdoing it to regret later in life.

Finally,

Let nature takes it course.

To everybody.

Oh...another abstract expressionist drawing.

Life, as it is.

Life, as it is.
40 inch x 50 inch

Yet another of my recent work.

Life, a simple one.

"Life, a simple one."
20 cm x 20 cm

Yes. I have pick up painting again.
It has been a while since I painted something properly.
This is my recent work.

Just a leaf...with water droplets.

Miss Sha is ME!

We were drawing turtle for that day...and the students drew me.
And the tiny square object the turtle me was holding was a camera.
Because I always carry a camera during lesson to take photos.
And yah...my students always spell my name wrongly...

Good afternoon!

By the way, they spelled my name wrongly.

Haig Girls! painting roses...

Hello! Mr Grasshopper!

Spotted at Haig Girls while waiting for the girls to start lesson.

My eye for abstract expressionist.

Please correct my grammer.

Eh eh...XN was saying my blog got plenty of grammer error.
Issit?
PLEASE.
IF YOU SEE ANY,
comment and correct me ON THE SPOT.
So that I know I made a mistake.
Or else I will assume there is nothing wrong.

Thank you.

Chinese song lyrics appreciation - 2

Yet another good song...
A song by Xiao Jing Teng.

原諒我


作詞：阿沁 & 陳天佑 & 吳易緯 作曲：阿沁


請不要分了以後 還記得親吻過的承諾
你的永久已不屬於我
默默低頭 那時我很多話哽在喉嚨

你的笑 你的快樂 不是我愛太多 想太多
我能感受他比我適合
愛放了手 我偽裝冷漠 比你先說分手

請原諒我 原諒我不成熟
不愛你是藉口 好讓你離開我
請原諒我 好想自私將你佔有
一個寂寞就給我承受 換你過更好的生活

請不要分了以後 還記得親吻過的承諾
你的永久已不屬於我
默默低頭 那時我很多話哽在喉嚨

你的笑 你的快樂 不是我愛太多 想太多
我能感受他比我適合
愛放了手 我偽裝冷漠 比你先說分手

請原諒我 原諒我不成熟
不愛你是藉口 好讓你離開我
請原諒我 好想自私將你佔有
一個寂寞就給我承受 換你過更好的生活

愛過恨過哭過也笑過
親吻過你的脆弱 其實我比誰都要懦弱

原諒我 必須假裝愛錯
別讓時間倒流 我怕說不出口
原諒我 沒有解釋太多心痛
別無所求 徹底忘了我 愛原來要捨得

我難過 我才懂

Chinese song lyrics appreciation - 1

I am not a fan of Sun Yanzi.
But this is a very good song that I came across one day.
Was impressed by the lyrics and found out that
it was written by my all time favourite lyricist...
accompanied by my favourite chinese instrument-Er-hu.

眼淚成詩

词:林夕

我已經 已經把我傷口化作玫瑰

我的淚水 已經變成雨水早已輪迴

我已經 已經把對白留成了永遠

忘了天色 究竟是黑是灰

　

分手傷了誰 誰把它變美

我的眼淚寫成了詩 已無所謂

讓你再回味 字不醉人人自醉

因為回憶 總是美

　

我已經 已經把絕情變成了恭維

因為不配 你就忽然自卑說聲失陪

我已經 已經把沉默變成了懺悔

無路可退 只能無言以對

分手傷了誰 誰把它變美

我的眼淚寫成了詩 一首 無所謂

讓你再回味 字不醉人人自醉

你的品味 總是美

By the way...

As much as I hate to do funding application.
I am proud that I completed one and learn many things during the process.

GOOD JOB GAL!

And many thanks to JM, LW and YQ for helping.

Yet another friend...attaching soon.

Found out that a friend is soon to be attached.
Feeling a bit low...
Not that I have any special feelings for him..but
Because I know...this friend will soon disappear from my life.
One by one..like all others...

I am still happy for them.
But I am just feeling sad for myself.
I can't be wishing everybody to be left on the shelf like me.
I can only wish I am not the only left.

Or best...get off the shelf myself.

Another someone.

Met another friend of 10 years recently.
He was a schoolmate.
10 years ago...I also had a tiny winy crush on him
Ok ok...I am someone who falls in love too easily.
I can't help it.

Nothing happen 10 years ago.
We are just friends in the end.

We met up on and off every few years...
He is a very eligible guy i have to admit,
but somehow, we are too different.
Our meeting always end with a thought...
"Hmm....there is a reason why we are just friends until now."

And yah...that's all.

All the best to him too.

Someone.

He is a junior of mine 10 years ago.
I used to have a tiny crush on him.
Met him in a gathering just weeks ago...
heard that he is getting married soon.

My heart...felt a tiny winy pinch...just a little...
not enough to cause any pain...
But is enough to cause an unknown sensation of "hmm".

I am trying to remember why I like him in the past.
I remember he seldom smile...
And i like his quiet and cool image.
But I just found out...he did not smile...becos...of his teeth.
He has braces on now...and full of smile now...

Met him again on a bus just a few days ago on a bus with his mum and future wife...

Agree to play mahjong one of these days...
He is moving to my neighbourhood soon.

Hmm....

What can I say.

All the best to him.

Sad.

Once again, I did not win any UOB award.
Although I do understand that not winning does not mean my art is not good.
I am just disappointed that my effort are wasted.

Clothes drying machine...

I was telling YH about how i feel when i saw the clothes drying machine...
She gave me a very surprising answer...
"you will be surprise...there are people who really needs one..."
Which is her.
She dun have a place to dry her clothes...and if outdoor...is expose to rain...and no one is looking after the clothes...anybody can take away their clothes...
Well...I guess...it does makes a difference the kind of condition and setting you live in.
It just happen some people just need a clothes dryer.

Oh well.

I HATE WRITTING FUNDING APPLICATION

HATE HATE HATE!

Hole in a pocket.

I am suddenly very poor this month.
I will only recover at the end of the year.
But...life have to go on.
And I cannot give up!

JIAYOU! JIAYOU! JIAYOU!

???!!!???!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!???!?!

Have you seen this ads on the MRT train before?
I took this photo just yesterday.
In fact I notice this advert long ago...
Yet everytime I saw it...
I couldn't help but to wonder
WHO NEEDS A CLOTHES DRYER in SINGAPORE?
Although I am aware that in some high class condo you are not allow to air your clothes into the sun like in a HDB flat...and some might need a dryer...
But bUT BUt but....
I still dun understand HOW THIS ADVERT MAKES SENSE.
"We use lesser energy...blah blah...save you blah blah amount per year in energy cost..."
???!??
HELLO! This is SINGAPORE.
THE SUN IS FREE.
FREE! FREE! FREE!

More than beautiful.

I love to dive and one of the main reason is this.
More than beautiful,
They are simply SUBLIME.
But this picture is taken in JR's house...
In order to own beautiful things...
Human beings remove them from their nature habitat.
They are beautiful..but they will be even more beautiful if they are in the sea.
Though I am really thankful for this photo opportunity
to take a picture of the coral up close at the comfort of a tank...
I still feel sad that it is taken out of the sea.

As requested by LW.

A lovely pair of apples drawn by LW with a little help from me.
By the way, I have eaten them and they are yummy.