5 seconds of happiness...

He was finally online yesterday night..for like 5 seconds...
And I was happy enough...even though he apparently forgot my birthday...
It was not important anymore...

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I dun like this kind of dependency I have for him...
Makes me uncontrollably sad and happy....

I like my old peaceful self...not happy nor sad...
just contented and peaceful...
I want my old self back...

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But I will keep trying....
Until I am myself again...

I will keep trying...

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I wish...

Today...is my birthday...
which is going to be over soon...in 10 minutes time...

My only happiness for the day...a pair of silver earrings I bought from the night market which I knew was overpriced but I liked it since 3 weeks ago...
yet I was criticise by my brother(which I have expected him to do so...)for being stupid...

Today was yet another day...

And the thing that I really wished for...is to chat with him online...
regardless of whether he remembers my birthday....

One more minute....and this sad day will be over...

Since my wish is not going to come true anyway....

Maybe I should make another wish for the whole year...

I just wish to be happy.

Be happy.

Please....let me be happy.

Somebody...make me happy please.