Can you imagine...?

Well...to many of us...striking rich can be a solution to all problems...
Yet becoming TOO rich suddenly can cause other problems.
I have been thinking...
If i win the rollover...

I will stop looking for a job...
go for a long holiday...
lost the sense of competition and excitement in life...
becos i can have anything i want(materially)...
dun have to work hard to buy something i like...
dun have to work very hard for my art...
becos i dun have to impress any scholarship or funding boards to fund my work anymore...
then...I will stop doing my art...
which are based on my hardship and determination to become an artist for life...
perhaps i will not stop making art totally...
just that the direction of my art might change drastically...
not a bad thing...
but cannot speculate what it will become...

of cos...I will grow fat...becos i dun have to work anymore..
and can buy all the good food...
and eat a lot...since i am too free and not working...

of cos...i will become lazy...
bad bad...

and slurge all my money on useless things...spend and spend...
and becomes nothing...
lost the direction and goals in life...
ah...scary...

BUT BUT BUT...

I know I will not allow myself to become like dat...
At least...it will be a wise thing to invest my money for the future...and gave my money also to my family and friends...if they need fundings for their dreams...
plus..do a lot of charity work...i probably would like to go to areas like rural china, cambodia and thailand...to see the children in needs...build school...hire teachers...
He and i agree to share our winnings...so he will have half of watever...
and he also agrees that he will be in charge of the african side...doing charity.

Then...we will travel around the world...half backpack...becos we do enjoy a little simple and wild travel...
half luxury...go for good food...and interesting destinations...

Regardless of whether our relationship will last...
I would still want a personal art studio...
with fully equiped facilities...


then...start to have solo exhibitions worldwide...

Open a pub...with a live stage..playing good music...

open a restauarnt...cook good food...

open a publishing house...
publish personal writings...
and interesting blogs and artists book...

make short films...
make movies...
write scripts for theatres...
start art projects...

of course...by 35 years old..i want to have at least 2 kid...
if not..more...

I wanna learn millions of things...
pick up at least a few more languages...
japanese...korean...thai...german?...french...?..italian?...greek..spanish...??
pick up a few instrument...piano?...gu-zhen(chinese zither)...??..violin??
learn how to make a persona website...hire a web technician...??
learn movie making and video editing...
learn chinese calligraphy..chinese paintings...chinese seal carving...
learn ceramics and pottery....traditional and comtemporary....
learn glass blowing....make glass work..
learn knitting....
learn various international cooking....Love to cook!
learn printmaking..
learn photography...
learn driving...ohh...better not...get a driver instead...hehe...
ohh...get my dive master cert...and go diving!!!!

Ahh....so many things to learn....

And things i realy wanna buy...

Have a personal library....
and buy a lot oof books...so that i can be reading a lot....
lots of artbooks...philo...travel...magazines...novels...japanese comics...

Have a collection of music...CDs..
vinyl tracks...
Good audio system....

Buy a lot of nice shoes...which I have been eyeing...
Buy a few good proper jeans...some nice dresses...blouses and t-shirts...
have an equiped wardrobe...I am not particular about dressing up though...
just a few nice ones which i will always wear...
and keep wearing...not too many clothes becos I dun like to think too much in terms of what to wear for the day...
so the lesser the choice...the lesser the fuss...so just a good collection of clothes that i will always wear...
not one that has too many clothes that i never wear...

ah...then a full set of diving gears...

good art equipments and materials in my studio....
all sort of oil paints full artist range....
acrylics...watercolours....pastel...crayons...
brushes...all sorts of canvases and papers...cutters...
colour pencils, markers...
wood carving tools...drills....saws....
pottery tools....kiln....
print-making tools....
good computers to support my protfolio and websites....
and video works...
printers....?...
sound room?...?

a superb kitchen....
with stove and ovens...
facilities from baking cakes and cookies to making timsum...
beautiful kitchen wares...different style...
chinese...japanese...western...watever.....greek?...
nice bowls...plates..cups...and different tea pots....
maybe some made by myself...

ah...buy nice towels and bed sheets....I like fabrics...
i like textile things...curtains..??...watever

hmm...enough buying...dun have much to buy actually....
i dun like cars...OHH...but a mini copper...the old original one...
I love that car....

and...yah...that's all...i guess...

I wonder is i have any money left after all these...or did i ask for too much...
and lastly just to do all the above things...with the fact that I am with someone i love and love me...
I hope that is not too much to ask for...

hmm....suddenly i realise...I can achieve all these...even if i din win a lottery...probably have to wait for 20 more years...when i have enough savings....and establish practices....I would be 45 by then....probably will have a house...which is also my studiopay by installaments)...with good collection of material over the years....well travelled by 45(get travel fundings and art residencies)....have a superb kitchen by then....have at least 2 kids( not a difficult thing if i get married by 35)...a good wardrobe of enough clothings i need( i actually got enough...just a few more for vanity)....good collections of books which i will never finish reading(library)...good collection of music....(download online)....learn a couple of languages as I travel....learn ceramics and pottery along the way....have a good personal website.....and publish a few books....make a few short films...wrote a few theatre and movie scripts....opena small pubs with friends...or with my brothers....or a restaurant....and pop by to eat good food....

Hmm....maybe if i dun win...i just have to wait for another 20 years....I can wait really....
but....what if...I am still as poor and struggling like i am today....
being a poor and struggling artist...is not easy...no matter how determine...
it is not easy...

IF I WIN....and if i win.....THINGS WILL BE A LOT EASIER....dun you think..?

Look forward....
can you imagine...?


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