东风破

These 2 particular phrases is my favourite from 方文山's 东风破.

" 一壶漂泊浪迹天涯难入喉 你走之後酒暖回忆思念瘦 "

Due to the fact that my computer cannot type chinese..
I can only cut and paste the content.
I really like the subtle comparison of wandering life to wine that is hard to swallow...

Great lyrics.

青花瓷

词:方文山曲:周杰伦
素胚勾勒出青花笔锋浓转淡
瓶身描绘的牡丹一如你初妆
冉冉檀香透过窗心事我了然
宣纸上走笔至此搁一半

釉色渲染仕女图韵味被私藏
而你嫣然的一笑如含苞待放
你的美一缕飘散去到我去不了的地方

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
炊烟袅袅升起隔江千万里
在瓶底书汉隶仿前朝的飘逸
就当我为遇见你伏笔

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
月色被打捞起晕开了结局
如传世的青花瓷自顾自美丽你眼带笑意

色白花青的锦鲤跃然於碗底
临摹宋体落款时却惦记著你
你隐藏在窑烧里千年的秘密
极细腻犹如绣花针落地
帘外芭蕉惹骤雨门环惹铜绿
而我路过那江南小镇惹了你
在泼墨山水画里你从墨色深处被隐去

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
炊烟袅袅升起隔江千万里
在瓶底书汉隶仿前朝的飘逸
就当我为遇见你伏笔

天青色等烟雨而我在等你
月色被打捞起晕开了结局
如传世的青花瓷自顾自美丽你眼带笑意

If I win the 8 Million TOTO...

I dun remember what I had wanted in the past during my lottery fantasies...

But I guess they are more or less the same...except for during the period during my depression in UK...where I simply want to go home if i win the lottery.

Here goes the list.

1. Confirm and bank in my winnings .

And below in no particular order of preference.

1. Buy a house in Singapore and Thailand for my parents.
2. Bring my parents to travel.
3. Go travel myself! Dive dive dive!
4. Buy my own house.
5. Set up my studio with facilities and equipments and materials.
6. Have a nice well equipped kitchen.
7. Have a library of all the books I like.
8. Learn Yoga, tango, music, caligraphy, ikebana, ceramics, ....
9. Publish my books...write books and travel journals...
10. Do plenty of art works and have plenty of exhibitions.
11. Do charity.
12. open a cafe gallery and art space.
13. Invest.
14. Invite all my friends for dinners and KTV.

That's all.
I am happy and contented.
As for husband and kids...
I will leave that to fate.

2008, August, 8th, 8 MILLION!

8888888!
The chinese love the number 8.
And today is the big day.
Probably the day most chinese are getting married.
And for Singaporean, today is also the day for the BIG 8MILLION TOTO DRAW.

And so as always...
I will throw myself in a pool of fantasy to think about what if I win the draw.
As always...I will enjoy fantasizing until the result is announced.
I do not mind not winning...
Because the process of fantasizing is entertaining enough.

I cut my hair...

in my dream.
I dream of myself cutting my hair again.
I had this kind of dream many times...
and each time...there are different scenerio and emotions.
There are time where I will feel so much hurt and regrets that
i will cry and cry over my cut hair...
While there are times where I am happy and cheerful after cutting.
This time...I am simply puzzled.
I look into the mirro wondering if I am dreaming...in my dream..
that I have cut my hair...
until it was so real that I was convinced that it was cut off...
Suddenly...it became long again in african plait...
and then I realise I was dreaming....

As far as I can remember...the hairstyle was very short...
and I had a hard time taming my hair.
But I did enjoy the part I had some fringe on my forehead...

Oh well...
It is only a matter of time I cut my hair...
Just wonder what kind of hairstyle.

2nd August 1998

was the last time I cut my hair.

Plan B

Is to go Holland to do my MFA.
But...honestly..
I am also tempted to go Taiwan or Thailand to practice.

Give up stability to practice.

I am still thinking.

Seriously.

Plan A

Is gone.
My plan A was set 8 years ago.
Or even earlier...probably 10 years ago.
My plan is to get the scholarship from JCCI to go tokyo for my MFA.
Be a part time lecturer in some tertiary school...
Practice full time as an artist.

But eversince 2 month ago...Plan A is gone.
I am quite lost actually.
I need to rethink my future.
I activated my Plan B.
Plan B...

I am 28 now.

Time is running out.
For my art practice.
I need to establish myself before I reach 35.
Before I can start my stable life as an artist.
If I settle for stability now, it could mean compromising my art.
I have to give up my stable now...
So that art can be with me for the rest of my life...
with a stable life.

If i practice now...with my BA...
my part time will be low paid..
And my work will not be well funded.
And I have to struggle...and
cannot make both ends meet.

If i finish my MFA,
my part time will be better paid...
and my work will have a higher chances of getting funded.
Until I am independent and
finally practice full time eventually.

What I want is really simple.
Find someone I love who also love me...
to live the rest of my life with...
have a place I call home to live and work in...
have many kids...
share my life in the form of art...
Do what I love and make a living out of it...until I die.

Maybe...not so simple afterall.

Let go ...and grab it...

I am aware that I am feeling very uncertain about my future.
And I am also aware that there is something really HUGE that has been stopping me to express.
I am too careful.
I am afraid.
I am afraid that I will end up with nothing.
While I am trying very hard to stretch out my hand for my artistic expression....
Yet, holding on to stability with the other hand...
In the end...I always only can see but cannot reach art...
When I couldn't let go of stability.

I have to let go...
And grab it.

Every now and then...

I redefine my past all the time.
Because I grow and learn new things.
Because I begin to understand things that I do not understand in the past.

I redefine my love history as something I cannot avoid.
Although it is my greatest mistake for making such choices,
I cannot say I regret it.

You love because you love.
Even if you know there is no future.
At that moment, there is no need for future.

What is right before your eyes is the truth at that moment of time...
And afterwhich, it will become a past...
to be remembered if worth remembering...
And will make you what you are in the future.
If you only see the future...
Then your future will be a result of your meaningless past...
which will be meaningless as a future.
Nothing for you to look back on..
Always overlooking what is right before you.

Have you overlook your present.
Have you missed out what is right before your eyes now?

Look around around you now.

This is joyce.

She is my student.
She is an artist.
Her work is expressive and powerful.
Not only visually...but also physically.
She produces her artwork with fast and hard brushstrokes...
often with a lot of strength...(spoiling the markers tips)
Her subject matters are wild, random and full of imagination!
Her work may look messy and unconventional.
But every bit a masterpiece!
And I love it!

Juicy..!

Have not painted still life for a long time...
was so tempted to paint one last week...
that I join in the fun and painted this.
I am happy.

Erm...

Seriously talented girls - Haig Girls.

Comic drawing exercise.

Look...I am serious when I say they can't spell my name.

By the way...thanks girls!

I think my students love me...but somehow...

They always spell my name wrongly..?!??!

100種生活 Lyrics.

100種生活
作詞:鍾成虎 作曲:盧廣仲

整個世界 停止 不轉動 很寂寞
走在海邊 數著 螢火蟲 好困惑
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
不想掉進這深深 漩渦

整個海洋 擺動 柔軟地 舉起我
孤獨給我 自由 猶豫得 好感動
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
該怎麼走 誰來告訴我 wow

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我要的生活

整個海洋 擺動 柔軟地 舉起我
孤獨給我 自由 猶豫得 好感動
想要的生活怎麼有一百種
該怎麼走 誰來告訴我 wow

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我(想)要的生活

每當我背對星空
抱著地球
發現自己其實脆弱 不敢說
當我背對星空
孤獨摸索
愛情漸漸萎縮 我猜不透
無邊的宇宙 哪裡有我要的生活
原來一百分之一
要在很久很久以後才會懂

盧廣仲 100種生活

This guy...he decided to pick up his guitar to start singing after a traffic accident.
Maybe in life, you have to be brave enough to embrace passion..
Or you might just die in regrets.

For me, I am simply too afraid that being a full time artist will earn myself nothing.
Hence I am nowhere...hanging on as a part time artist...
Yet, did not achieve anything....in my art practice and my career.

If I can be brave enough to choose and do something totally...
WITHOUT REGRETS.

Maybe I should give up something altogether and do something totally.

If I am brave enough like him.
Maybe I can create something as beautiful as this song like him.

Meanwhile, ENJOY THIS SONG.
A GREAT SONG!

Youtube below!

盧廣仲 100種生活-ON REPEAT MODE NOW!

The place call home.

It has become very clear to me where is home for me now.
Home is where I feel the most comfortable, most relax and safe.
Home is where I do not feel restricted.
And be myself.

Singapore is the place I grew up in with many friends and memory.
However, that home with my parents in it...
is the only place I feel safe and relax...without restriction.

This place that I am staying in now in Singapore...
is my temporary home...
As comfortable as I try to make myself feel...
I still always do not feel totally comfortable.
And somehow on many occassion...
I was being reminded that this is not my own home.

My home now...is the home where my parents are staying now in Chiang Mai.
Not Thailand.
But that home.
The home with my family around.

That is my home.
Nowadays...I will tell my friend..."I am going home.."
when I am going "back" to Chiang Mai...

That kind of feeling..
If you know what I mean.

But then...
I am always proud to be a Singaporean.

A singaporean who is proud to be one...
But no longer feels at home.

Sadly.

This thing call friendship.

I realise...

Different kind of friends play different role in your life.
While u play different role to your friends' lives.


Some friends...are those you call up every few days...to update your life.
Since they already know what is going on in your life.
Or Even if there is nothing going on in your life...
However, if there is a lagged in updating information or delay for too long.
Interaction level will drop if communication is always initiated one-sidedly.


Some friends...are those...you see once in a while...
or some... once in a blue moon.
Yet, it seems perfectly alright to you.
You just need to catch up and move on.


Some friends, you just know they will call you.
And you don't have to call them.
However, if they do not call you,
you will only call them when you remember to.


Some friends, you will only remember when you meet them in gatherings.
And the next meeting is the next wedding dinner perhaps.

Some, are those you can call in the middle of the night at 3am and they will not get angry...

Some, strangely likes to calls you at 12 midnight...

Some, are those who share the same taste as you when it comes to watching movies.

Some, you will not want to travel with though they are your good friends.

Some, share most of the mahjong session of your life.

Some, are your best KTV mates.

Some, are good to go shopping with.

Some, likes the same kind of food.

Some, goes to the late night weekend sales with you...

Some, wake up early in the morning and go to the library sales with you...

Some, always meet you at Kinokuniya...

Some, you talk to them about politics...

Some, you share your dreams...

Some, you pour your woes....

Some, you share your philosophy in life...

Some, you talk about man....

Some, you may want to keep a distance because you are afraid of getting hurt .

Some, keep a distance from you, because they do not want to hurt you.

Some, automatically drift away because of time and distance.

Some, will always buy you something when they go abroad...

Some, will remember your birthday.

Some, you are just contented not to keep in contact until you have to.

Some, if you do not keep in contact, you will lose them.

Some, will correct your grammar mistakes...

Some, like to point out your typo.

Some, are those who have known you for more than half of you life so far...

Some, reads your blog...

Some, did not know you have a blog...

Some, simply understand why you like to watch K-drama...

Some, have been waiting for you to cut your hair for a long long time ...


Which one are you?

You play the role you play as a friend.

I was complaining to RS about my best friend, YH.
As usual, I was complaining that I am being neglected since she get married.
Then RS said..."you also never call me when I was abroad."
Yes, I dun have the habit to call RS as she will call me most of the time.

And so...I realise....

Different friends fill up different aspect of your life.

YH is never the person to call me
but the one always there waiting for my call.
And the reason for me feeling neglected was due to the fact that
I feel bad disturbing her new found married life...
and stop calling her.

So it was not her fault.

It was mine.

So, I sent her an sms.

And she replied.

:)

I like my current job.

Yes, the time flexibity and reasonably pay...
Is one of the reason why I like my current job.
But the most satisfying of all....
Are my students.
I am teaching them to grow up.
While they teach me to be like a child again.

I am thankful.

Pissed.

As always...I am pissed helping people who take me for granted.
I don't want to say who.
They probably don't know they are.
That is the scary part.

Buddha forbids.
Arh mi tuo fu.

The annual library book sales!

Opps...forget to take photos.
Too busy to.
Bought 15 books altogether.
$2 each :)
But felt guilty.
Afterall, I only want to read them, with no intention to keep some of them.
But...I always end up with a lot of overdue books without reading them.
That is why i decided to buy.
I hope I can finish reading some of them...and gave them away after reading.

Maybe, I did try my best.

I have been thinking if I am capable of stopping myself
from falling in love with someone
whom I know will hurt me.
Maybe, I did try my best back then.
But I failed.
Because, I am me.

Even if I was given the same scenario ...
Knowing I will be hurt...
I probably will still choose to love him...
But maybe in a different way.
I will keep my distance and love him quietly.

This is just me.
I am just silly.

Boys! They love machines! Part 3

This time round.
His job is to draw trees that looks like a palm.
Once again, this good boy drew as he was instructed.
He came and ask me if he can draw someone chopping off the tree.
With plenty of his own creative initiative, as always.
I give him my consent.
And he drew the robot to do the job.
WELL DONE! DOUGLAS!

Boys! They love machines! Part 2

This time, Doug was instructed to draw mice.
I wanted at least 2 mice.
He did.
One of them is a robot one.
And they are fighting.
Nice one!

Boys! They love machines! Part 1

Douglas, my primary one student.
He was suppose to draw a dog.
And he did.
But he added a tank!
Attacking the poor dog.
Good try!

Some memories.

Talking to RS lately remind me of my past.
So many...too many.
There were times that I was happy.
There were times...I was sad.

I claimed that I have get over him long ago.
But the scar will always be there.
It is not painful anymore.
But it reminded me of how painful it was.

While giving advice to relationship matters now...
I can only say...
Leave it as it is...at it's best.
And not overdoing it to regret later in life.

Finally,

Let nature takes it course.

To everybody.

Oh...another abstract expressionist drawing.

Life, as it is.

Life, as it is.
40 inch x 50 inch

Yet another of my recent work.

Life, a simple one.

"Life, a simple one."
20 cm x 20 cm

Yes. I have pick up painting again.
It has been a while since I painted something properly.
This is my recent work.

Just a leaf...with water droplets.

Miss Sha is ME!

We were drawing turtle for that day...and the students drew me.
And the tiny square object the turtle me was holding was a camera.
Because I always carry a camera during lesson to take photos.
And yah...my students always spell my name wrongly...

Good afternoon!

By the way, they spelled my name wrongly.

Haig Girls! painting roses...

Hello! Mr Grasshopper!

Spotted at Haig Girls while waiting for the girls to start lesson.

My eye for abstract expressionist.

Please correct my grammer.

Eh eh...XN was saying my blog got plenty of grammer error.
Issit?
PLEASE.
IF YOU SEE ANY,
comment and correct me ON THE SPOT.
So that I know I made a mistake.
Or else I will assume there is nothing wrong.

Thank you.

Chinese song lyrics appreciation - 2

Yet another good song...
A song by Xiao Jing Teng.

原諒我


作詞：阿沁 & 陳天佑 & 吳易緯 作曲：阿沁


請不要分了以後 還記得親吻過的承諾
你的永久已不屬於我
默默低頭 那時我很多話哽在喉嚨

你的笑 你的快樂 不是我愛太多 想太多
我能感受他比我適合
愛放了手 我偽裝冷漠 比你先說分手

請原諒我 原諒我不成熟
不愛你是藉口 好讓你離開我
請原諒我 好想自私將你佔有
一個寂寞就給我承受 換你過更好的生活

請不要分了以後 還記得親吻過的承諾
你的永久已不屬於我
默默低頭 那時我很多話哽在喉嚨

你的笑 你的快樂 不是我愛太多 想太多
我能感受他比我適合
愛放了手 我偽裝冷漠 比你先說分手

請原諒我 原諒我不成熟
不愛你是藉口 好讓你離開我
請原諒我 好想自私將你佔有
一個寂寞就給我承受 換你過更好的生活

愛過恨過哭過也笑過
親吻過你的脆弱 其實我比誰都要懦弱

原諒我 必須假裝愛錯
別讓時間倒流 我怕說不出口
原諒我 沒有解釋太多心痛
別無所求 徹底忘了我 愛原來要捨得

我難過 我才懂

Chinese song lyrics appreciation - 1

I am not a fan of Sun Yanzi.
But this is a very good song that I came across one day.
Was impressed by the lyrics and found out that
it was written by my all time favourite lyricist...
accompanied by my favourite chinese instrument-Er-hu.

眼淚成詩

词:林夕

我已經 已經把我傷口化作玫瑰

我的淚水 已經變成雨水早已輪迴

我已經 已經把對白留成了永遠

忘了天色 究竟是黑是灰

　

分手傷了誰 誰把它變美

我的眼淚寫成了詩 已無所謂

讓你再回味 字不醉人人自醉

因為回憶 總是美

　

我已經 已經把絕情變成了恭維

因為不配 你就忽然自卑說聲失陪

我已經 已經把沉默變成了懺悔

無路可退 只能無言以對

分手傷了誰 誰把它變美

我的眼淚寫成了詩 一首 無所謂

讓你再回味 字不醉人人自醉

你的品味 總是美

By the way...

As much as I hate to do funding application.
I am proud that I completed one and learn many things during the process.

GOOD JOB GAL!

And many thanks to JM, LW and YQ for helping.

Yet another friend...attaching soon.

Found out that a friend is soon to be attached.
Feeling a bit low...
Not that I have any special feelings for him..but
Because I know...this friend will soon disappear from my life.
One by one..like all others...

I am still happy for them.
But I am just feeling sad for myself.
I can't be wishing everybody to be left on the shelf like me.
I can only wish I am not the only left.

Or best...get off the shelf myself.

Another someone.

Met another friend of 10 years recently.
He was a schoolmate.
10 years ago...I also had a tiny winy crush on him
Ok ok...I am someone who falls in love too easily.
I can't help it.

Nothing happen 10 years ago.
We are just friends in the end.

We met up on and off every few years...
He is a very eligible guy i have to admit,
but somehow, we are too different.
Our meeting always end with a thought...
"Hmm....there is a reason why we are just friends until now."

And yah...that's all.

All the best to him too.

Someone.

He is a junior of mine 10 years ago.
I used to have a tiny crush on him.
Met him in a gathering just weeks ago...
heard that he is getting married soon.

My heart...felt a tiny winy pinch...just a little...
not enough to cause any pain...
But is enough to cause an unknown sensation of "hmm".

I am trying to remember why I like him in the past.
I remember he seldom smile...
And i like his quiet and cool image.
But I just found out...he did not smile...becos...of his teeth.
He has braces on now...and full of smile now...

Met him again on a bus just a few days ago on a bus with his mum and future wife...

Agree to play mahjong one of these days...
He is moving to my neighbourhood soon.

Hmm....

What can I say.

All the best to him.

Sad.

Once again, I did not win any UOB award.
Although I do understand that not winning does not mean my art is not good.
I am just disappointed that my effort are wasted.

Clothes drying machine...

I was telling YH about how i feel when i saw the clothes drying machine...
She gave me a very surprising answer...
"you will be surprise...there are people who really needs one..."
Which is her.
She dun have a place to dry her clothes...and if outdoor...is expose to rain...and no one is looking after the clothes...anybody can take away their clothes...
Well...I guess...it does makes a difference the kind of condition and setting you live in.
It just happen some people just need a clothes dryer.

Oh well.

I HATE WRITTING FUNDING APPLICATION

HATE HATE HATE!

Hole in a pocket.

I am suddenly very poor this month.
I will only recover at the end of the year.
But...life have to go on.
And I cannot give up!

JIAYOU! JIAYOU! JIAYOU!

???!!!???!?!?!?!??!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!???!?!

Have you seen this ads on the MRT train before?
I took this photo just yesterday.
In fact I notice this advert long ago...
Yet everytime I saw it...
I couldn't help but to wonder
WHO NEEDS A CLOTHES DRYER in SINGAPORE?
Although I am aware that in some high class condo you are not allow to air your clothes into the sun like in a HDB flat...and some might need a dryer...
But bUT BUt but....
I still dun understand HOW THIS ADVERT MAKES SENSE.
"We use lesser energy...blah blah...save you blah blah amount per year in energy cost..."
???!??
HELLO! This is SINGAPORE.
THE SUN IS FREE.
FREE! FREE! FREE!

More than beautiful.

I love to dive and one of the main reason is this.
More than beautiful,
They are simply SUBLIME.
But this picture is taken in JR's house...
In order to own beautiful things...
Human beings remove them from their nature habitat.
They are beautiful..but they will be even more beautiful if they are in the sea.
Though I am really thankful for this photo opportunity
to take a picture of the coral up close at the comfort of a tank...
I still feel sad that it is taken out of the sea.

As requested by LW.

A lovely pair of apples drawn by LW with a little help from me.
By the way, I have eaten them and they are yummy.

I feel sad.

I met an acquaintance today.
He is a good artist.
I have to admit I love his work.
I first saw his work in SAM...
A slide show of food he ate while he is studying overseas.
My work in glasgow is similar...but more general...
And should I say...with my personal touch...
I like to keep paper trash...and daily stuff...
I love his work...
But I feel sad.
Because he had done all the stuff that I wanted to do BEFORE I CAN DO MINE.
One of his works...
Unpacking London...
as he was unpacking and documenting this he send back from london...
I felt likel...being overtaken by a fast car on an expressway...
I actually wanted to do mine...which was...erm...TOO LATE.
Sometimes in art...first come first serve is important.
When u are slower ....you are copying.
But still I love his work.
Nevertheless.

Maybe we share a lot of similar sentiments.
Maybe he will like my work too.

:)

Text-based installation

I just found out on monday...
I love to use text in my art work.
I will show something mundane but change it's meaning with text.
I like to use text to maneuver and present my ideas.

And so far...I am happy with my text base work.
And began to see some repetition in terms of style.
Maybe using text together with objects is my style.

I am starting to see some light now.
And that is something I am happy about.

Oh...suddenly...I have this thinking...
Maybe my blue is due to the fact that i was too happy on monday
That I have found some distinct style in my work...
that i have used up my happy quota for the next day..
hence...I feel blue today.

That could really be the reason.
Really...really really really...

This is a happy day...

I ask my student to write a comic strip story
about anything they like.
And I got this from a little girl.

Eligible(perfect) vs Suitable

First of all,
Let me just admit that I am aware that
those cute and handsome guys from korean drama...
DO NOT EXIST IN REAL LIFE.
Or maybe as far as I know.
Maybe there are...but I have yet to meet any.

However, I would like to clarify the idea between
ELIGIBLE (PERFECT) and SUITABLE.
This guy may be perfect.
All the girls like him including me.
BUt he may not be suitable for me.
This I am fully aware.
Notice I used eligible with a bracket perfect beside it.
It is just the normal way of understanding how the normal people will see...
very eligible guy as the perfect guy.

Maybe my friend YH did not realise that her best friend has grown up.
As she always insist that I am still the me she knew 10 years ago...
When I told her how obsessed I am with korean drama and the guy in it...

Meanwhile...
Let me give an example to illustrate my point.
Well...this guy may be perfect.
He is rich and handsome.
Well dressed and well mannered.
Act like a prince charming.
But...in real life..
He will scare me off...
Erm...to be precise..
I WILL SCARE HIM OFF.
Hence this is a case of perfect but not suitable.

This guy may be sloppy and casually dressed.
Unshaven and wear dirty jeans.
But he may be my cup of tea.

I can only imagine this much as I have got no idea who is suitable for me yet.
So far...
There was once in my life that I thought
I had found someone perfect FOR me...
which i though was suitable for me...
Turns out...
It was the worst choice I have made.
Hence...I cannot gauge who is most suitable for me now...

Until I meet the next.

Meanwhile...
I am not looking for anyone perfect.
No one is anyway.
Just someone who is suitable.

Word Verification.

Did anyone of you out there notice that the word verification
is getting harder and harder to recognise??

I remember doing word verification in the past
and felt insulted when i have to verify ABC
to prove that I am human...

After getting used to this system for a while..
I get annoyed again...
this time...
by how difficult it is getting..

Why I feel blue today?

Man.
Likes to solve problem.

I was telling JM about my blues today...
I just wanted to tell someone.
Becos I believe by telling someone about my sadness...
I will release that sadness in me...and be free of it.

But I ended up doing analysis with JM about why I am feeling blue.
That was hard.
He is manage that quite well.
And the root of my sadness was MONEY indirectly.
which is a good try.

As my day proceed...
I was sharing my woes to as many people as I can get my hands on...
I begin to realise another source of my blue.

I actually had that moment in me today..
To think of just giving up art...and just settle down to find a full time job.
Actually...if i really do that...
All my financial issue will be resolved.
But the tot of giving up art...
Upset me.

I am not sure which part of art I cannot bear to part...
Sometimes I wonder if i really passionately love to produce art...
As I do not have the motivation to produce them sometimes...
As there are no incentive to.
The more i produce...
the more trash I create.
I can't sell them...and not meant to be sold.
And i wonder why i produce them
and after spending time and money to make them...
they worth nothing.
Maybe art...can be reduce to the level of apreciation...
or even teaching for me...
And I shall just live with that...
But the thought...makes me sad.
What exactly do I like about art?
What is it that i really need about art??
I do not have a concrete answer yet to that.

But I am sure...I am sad today...
More or less because...even though I am free for so many days...
I did not spend more time with my art making...
And i just wasted my time away.
I am afraid that I am just using art as an excuse not to work hard.

That is why I am feeling blue.

Chinese contemporary artist from China.

Painting by Yue Min Jun

Last week a few of our colleagues gathered for
a small party to bid farewell to a fellow colleague
who is going away to study.
As we are feeling cosy and nice
in the dimly lit office...
One of my colleague(from Lasalle) commented
that she do not like NAFA.
I just smile. I am proud to declare I am from NAFA.
There are things I don't like about my school as well.
Just like when she will also complain about her own school sometimes.
But she gave a reason that I cannot accept.
She said...there are too many CHINA student in NAFA.
Not that she is discriminating against them she claim..
she insisted that it is about nationalism.
I cannot keep my silence anymore and rebutted her.
There are nothing wrong with chinese student from china.
In fact, most of them are way better than us.
Then she admit..."yes they are better in techniques....but"
She is trying to argue that..they are just good in technique...
and cannot compare in terms of conceptualisation...
from what i can understand...as her arguement moves along..
I can only say..she did not realise what is going on in the global market.
Not to mention those work of art from china which fetches millions...
China Conceptual artist are now making bombastic,
radical, outrages and experimental art beyond our imagination.
And their skillful technique...is merely part of their asset.
To enable them to express.
Having impressive skill in art making is like having a good tool.
If the artist do not have essential concept about their art...
their work will only be worthy as craft.
However...if an artist over conceptualise their work...
but is not able to visually express themself..
it will then be worst then a piece of craft.
For me..
I conceptualise..yet...I am constantly reminding myself..
To improve my skill to express my concept vividly.
Finally, as someone who once studied overseas...
I realise the importance of accepting and learning from differences.
If techinique is what most singaporean artist is lacking,
then it is the best opportunity for us to learn from those
who are better then us in this area.
Disliking them...will not improve our ability.
Learning from them is my best advice.
As for concept...
honestly...singaporean artist are sometimes
too rootless to define ourself in art...
and we end up...
mostly producing "western-like" art which lacks identity.
Sadly, that is most of the case.
Look at a piece of painting from China..
you will probably know it is from china...
the moment you see it.
Their political references...their skills and craft...
is simply too distinct.
I do not like to admit myself that I am guilty of being inferior as compare to fellow chinese from china ...I am a chinese from Singapore.
Let's just say...
We still have a lot to learn from each other to be fair.

Feeling blue...

I am feeling rather blue today.
Strangely.
I am not happy at all that I have 10 days of NO-Work.
I should be doing my art.
I have been complaining about not having enough time to do my work.
Yet, when I have time I don't know how to start.
I feel lost.
Out of these 10 days...
I used one day...to finish my proposal for esplanade.
I used one whole day to sleep.
I used another day to surf net watch online videos...
and one day to feel lost.
Today is my 5th day.
I suddenly feel BLUE.
I felt horrible.
I dig out my canvas and start to prime my old canvas.
And still feel blue.

How?

Annoying things...

1. Board the MRT with a pregnant lady. Means the chances of me getting the next available seat on the MRT is ZERO.

2. Waking and saw a whole table of food prepared for lunch...with a WHOLE DUCK, a pot of soup, a pot of toufu dish and a pot of preserved vege...EACH POT...is usually enough for my usual family of 5 to eat for 2 meals. Yet..all these...is only for 2 people to eat...and my nanny claim all these food will last us for 3 days..which I dun believe her. Because I know she will end up throwing all the food away if not finished by tomolo as she always do. I HATE WASTAGE. AND I HATE FORCE FEEDING. I am that kind who will eat and eat and try to finish up food...so that food are not wasted. But living with someone like that...It just makes me VERY ANGRY. I do understand that people will say...I am..."shen zai fu zhong bu zhi fu"...but...honestly...eating is NO LONGER A JOY to me sometimes because of her. If I ever get aneroxic...that is because of my nanny. Ok ok...I am spoiled. I should be glad that someone cook for me. But i really cannot stand it.

3. I am annoyed by myself and feels guilty than I cannot appreciate my nanny's love.

4. I dun seem to have the concentration to do my proposal.

1..2...smile...

More smile...

Smile...

Some father.

I had an annoying student this morning.

She asked me "Teacher, are you from china?"

I reply by asking her "why? So what if I am...so what if I am not?"

She answered.."My father say you are a china woman."

His father saw me for less than a minute at the school gate when he sent his girl to my class and he made such a comment.

I am pissed.

Not because they think I am from China.

I dun mind if peope mistaken me as a china chinese.
Afterall, I am a chinese. I am used to being mixed up when I am in UK.
But when I get mixed up in Singapore...
Most of those who think that I am from China...
will carry tone of despise when they have such assumption.
I ask my student,

"so is you great grandfather not from china? Isn't your great grandfather a CHINA MAN.
It doesn't matter if I come from china or I am born here. It doesn't even matter if I am not a chinese. As long as we are all sitting around this same table, we are equal."

Her father is teaching her to discriminate her own race.

Halfway through my class...when i am teaching my lesson...
This student said,

" My father said art is NOT important."

I wonder why her dad sent her to my class if he thinks it is not important.

She refuses to do her worksheet properly...and emphasize that her dad says...art is not important and there is no need to put in any effort to it.

"My father give me a lot of worksheets to do...and he says no need to spend too much time in art"

I tried to tell her..ART is equally important to all her other subjects...though it is hard to convince her...becos art is sometimes NON-EXISTENCE in some primary school.
Even teacher is school sometimes ignore art lessons.

"Well...you can hate art, but you cannot say art is not important. If not, I can say Math is not important to me as well. " I told her.

She won't understand my arguement, she is only primary 3. I was just being childish and want to make silly arguements with children. She is a bright child I have to admit, but unfortunately very annoying. What I want to say is...I don't blame her...because a child will become what their parents teach.

At the end of the day, I can only conclude...
Though I only saw her father for less than 1 minute
and cannot even remember how he looks like.
BUT HE IS DEFINITELY A VERY ANNOYING PERSON.

Fathers' Day

Today I saw some text in front of a shop...
apparently to promote fathers' day...

"My father teach me about life not by his words..
but by how he live his(life)."
Something like that.
I suddenly feel so proud of my father.
Because my father teach me about life by how he live his as well.
He may not be perfect, but I am proud of him.

The Lee foundation...

I am suppose to finish this up last week...and I couldn't bring myself to do it until now.
I just feel too lethargic.

Happy Duan wu!

I happen to look at the calender...and realise today is Duan wu.
Dragon boat festival.

I had eaten my rice dumpling last week.

And I wonder if my parents made and eat some dumplings..

Weird thoughts...

I woke up in the morning thinking and counting to myself how many compound (2 characters chinese) surname are there altogether I can think of. It kept me awake for at least 10 minutes...until I fell asleep again.

I came up with...7 examples.

1. 歐陽
2.上官
3.司徒
4.司馬
5.公孫
6.西門
7.皇甫

I was pleased with myself then.

A few hours later...I woke up and couldn't help but to google for more examples.
I am sure there are more which I cannot remember.
And so I was right...
These chinese compound surnames are called 复姓. (Fu-xing)

Here are more which I guess you might find familiar too..(if you read as many chinese sword-play novel as me...or watch as many...)

1. 淳于
2. 東方
3. 獨孤
4. 呼延
5. 令狐
6. 慕容
7. 南宮
8. 完顏
9. 夏侯
10. 長孫
11. 諸葛

How about that!
I am done with this weird thoughts for the day.

Thank you for reading.

Boys and girls from the Holiday Drawing workshop =)

Thinking about my future.

I guess I am done with my grief.
And after griefing I need to move on.
I have been planning for my year ahead.

Should I go back to UK to work first?
Should I stay until September next year?
I wonder if JCCI would suddenly decide to open the application?
It is not a bad idea to be back in Thailand for a longer holiday.

To have a lot of choice..means I am still in bliss.

Afterall, the choice is still mine.

Then, recently...I have been asking myself...

"Is it ok if I don't do MA..can??ok??"

I need to address this.

Afterall, I want my MA experience to benefit my art practice.
If I am independent on my own...to practice, I probably...can do without my MA.

I am just thinking.
How confident I can be.

Oh well...just for now..

I need to think.

Second Choice.

My life...very interestingly is a result of second choices.

When I was a little girl in Primary 6...
RGS was my 1st choice for secondary school..
I ended up in RV, my second choice.
Turn out to be...not bad.
I enjoyed my days in RV and made valuable friends...for life.

When I was in RV,
Hwa Chong was my 1st choice for Junior college...
I ended up in NJC, my second choice.
Turn out to be..GREAT.
I enjoy my days in NJ and made more friends...
Found my dreams and made up my mind to pursue alternative.

When I was in NJC,
I thought I will choose Lasalle to study my art...
The fees then was too high...
I ended up in NAFA, my second choice.
Turn out to be...full of surprises.
I enjoy my days in NAFA, and as usual made more friends...
And carve a new path for my life.

When I was NAFA,
I wanted to study pottery...
I made a silly mistake because of a
misunderstanding of choices of coursework...
I ended up in the sculpture department, my second choice.
Turn out to be...FUN!
I enjoy my days hiding in the workshop to make things I like
Made sculpture my major and change my life.

When I graduated from NAFA,
I wanted to study in Edinburgh College of Art.
I ended up in Glasgow school of Art, my second choice.
Just because I happen to walk past GSA's booth
at an educational fair...
Turn out to be...days I never will forget.
I feel proud of myself remembering how hard I work to complete my studies there.

After I graduated from GSA,
I wanted to pursue my MA in Tokyo.
That long awaited MA scholarship which I am finally eligible to apply for.
I was inform on Monday...
They intend to cancel the offer of this scholarship.
What's new?
My life...
I suspect this time,
I will end up in Rotterdam, Piet Zwart for my MA.

My life...not too bad...even though not made up of first choices.
All of them turn out to be...of no regrets.

That's life.

My Life.

Thank you, LW.

There is this chinese saying...

塞翁失马 焉知非福

(Blessing in disguise)

To me, I want to see this JCCI incident as such...

Yet, at this moment, no matter what, I am in pain.

I will sometimes went into a daze to enjoy my own depresssion.

I am depressed.

The wait is too long.

Yet in the end...for nothing.

I am angry to be exact. With myself mostly.

Even YH and SY , my two best friends, did not see the important of this scholarship to me.
Not being able to fufil this scholarship dream will affect my life for the next 10 years.
My art practice, my home, my space, my savings, my family, my location, my way of life, the language I will hear around me, the weather around me, my skin condition, my diet, the air I breathe in, the food I eat....who I will meet.

I am sad because I am at lost.
I cannot visualize myself anywhere doing what and for what.
I am LOST.
Even though I actually did prepare myself a Plan B to go Netherland to study my MA if my tokyo scholarship fails...I did not prepare myself to jump into plan B before I even try Plan A.

And at this moment of grief...
Someone manage to divert a ray of hope into my depression...
And shed me new lights...for my future...
LW.
I would like to thank her with this post.
She manage to cheer me up in the mids of my angst with one sentence.
A brilliant twist of the great wisdom of 塞翁失马 焉知非福 from our chinese forefathers...

She said,

"Maybe you are fated to marry a Dutch."

Hmm...yah.

Why not.

Over cried.

I woke up just now...feeling thirsty..
and..with swollen eyes.

Due to...excessive crying.

I was sobbing to a MSN screen in the middle of the night while telling JM how sad I was because of JCCI.

Nevertheless, it is not finalised yet.

I shall keep my fingers crossed until the very last.

When it comes to such times in my life...

I kind of miss RS.
She would have understood my pain.

It is time.

If this decision by JCCI is confirmed.

Something flashes across my mind that it is time that I need to do something.

And it will be done.

It is time.

Fate to be NOT FATED TO BE.

There are only 3 occassions when I vividly remember that I need to call someone and cry.

1. One, when I was in glasgow. On the verge of breakdown because I was too poor to pay school fees and work like mad yet almost cannot pay rent, nothing left in the fridge to eat, and no time to go studio to do my art.

2. I was broken-heart and thought I will never love anyone again. ( And still cannot love anyone now.)

3. When I heard news from JCCI that they intend to stop the scholarship to Tokyo this afternoon when I called. This decision will change my life.

I was crying over the phone when I was talking to YH. Or should I say...I was only capable of crying and not talking at all then...after a few hours, I called her again, because I could call no one else. Maybe YH was trying to console me and suggest that...I did not really want the scholarship as much as I appear to be. I just want the money and go travel. But she underestimate the importance of this scholarship to me. It is not only the money. This scholarship is something that makes me work very hard for the past 7 or 8 years...I couldn't remember exactly. I wanted to apply for this scholarship when I was in NAFA. Back then, it offers BA. After I graduated, it changes it's policy and only offer MA. I had no choice but apply for my BA in UK. I finish my BA...but did not to rush back for the interview 3 years ago...because i was in love with someone whom I thought is more important than my dream. I was wrong. I missed my chance. Then, I came back with a broken heart. I thought I shall wait. For another 3 years. And now, It is time again to continue this dream, yet...I was told...they intend to cancel it.
Though it was not finalise yet, but the potential of it...is making me cry already.

I feel so angry that I was not even given the chance to try.

I am crying even now...while I am typing because I am angry.

Now...my mind is a blank...

I don't know how to continue my plan now.

Uk again or Holland?...SG?

NAFA or Lasalle? Sotheby?

Stay in SG or Thailand or Holland or UK?

Which scholarship?...Scotland? NAC?? LOTTERY?

What kind of art?

What kind of job can feed me???

I am thinking...as if I can think...

My mind is incapable of logistics anymore.

I can only weep. Crying over something I cannot control.

Maybe this scholarship is not meant for me.

Maybe it is my fate to be NOT FATED to be.

Let's hope they change their mind.

I would accept my fate if I applied and they did not choose me.

But...not when they did not even give me a chance to try.

Cloud boy.

Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce my new creation.
Cloud boy.
I am never good with illustration...but I want to try.
This is a character that in many sense resemble myself.
Cloud boy loves to put on jumper
and wears a head-dress that is in the shape of a cloud like my curly hair.

My heart stopped.

I called the JCCI today as I am getting impatient for the long awaited application of the scholarship to be opened.

The man over the phone with the usual japanese-accented english told me...they are still deciding whether they want to open the scholarship this year and they might stop the scholarship.

My heart stopped.
For a second.

Deep breathe...in.

Deep breathe...out.

This decision will change my life.

"What is this?"

I love children with weird ideas...
One day, I was teaching them how to draw a dog...
And this boy came out with this drawing...

When I asked..."what is this?"

"Alien dog!"

He replied...gleefully.

"When i die...I will become wind..."

2 weeks ago, I went to a Primary school to teach Primary 2 students to make windmills.

Just yesterday, this korean movie showing in channel U shows a woman making lots of windmill because her boyfriend who told her "when I die, I will become wind..." past away...
so that when the windmill spin...she will know he is back to see her...

I was flooding in tears when i see that...

What will I become when I die?

I wonder.

I want to be clouds in the sky...

It would be nice.

Mac vs PC Round 3

Just a recap.

Round 1. PC wins! Though it sounds like a tie, but I almost did decided to buy a Toshiba.
http://frillyobject.blogspot.com/2008/05/mac-vs-pc.html
Round 2. Mac wins! Totally fed up with window.
http://frillyobject.blogspot.com/2008/05/mac-vs-pc-round-2.html

Now, round 3.
I have been checking out price for MAc.
This is the final round...and I have to say...
Mac wins.

Why?

I ask around people who uses MAc and people who uses Pc about their own computers and how they feel about using them or switching it to PC or Mac...
And ask them to vote...whether they think I should buy a Mac or PC.
Below are some of my findings.

1. AG, who is a MAC user fully support the idea of getting a MAC, told me his macbook pro is GREAT!

2. JL, who is a PC user excitedly support the idea of getting a MAC, I ask her why...since she is a PC user...she says her boyfriend uses a mac and it is good.

3. JY, a PC user commented that her sister's new laptop's window vista is SHIT and warn me not to buy laptop with vista...which means...I should get a MAC...because unless i get old models in the market with window XP...or else all new laptop are either vista or MAC.

4. KY, a PC user commented that vista is sluggish.

5. SY says that her new laptop with vista...is "troublesome"

6. Someone commented in my blog that I should buy a PC...because it is more affordable.(and not because it is good?)

7. YQ is a PC user, says...get a mac...because he sound like he meant...I am not a heavy user and MAc is good enough for my usage. But I wanted to tell him...MAC can do heavy duty stuff as well.

8. AF, a MAc user ask me when I am getting a MAC.

9. None of my PC friend respond actively to my plead to vote whether I should buy a PC or MAC. They only reply when I ask...and then sort of reluctantly says...get a MAC if you can afford.

10.MOST of those who respond excitedly...VOTE FOR MAC!

Of course, I do understand MAc is not perfect as I have mention in round 1.
The weak MSN ability. and problem of not playing WMA...


But you are sensible and you can think.
You tell me, from the above findings...

Is it PC or MAC?

I want to say thank you too.

While reading the comments from my students...
This 7 years old boy came to me and say...
(exactly what he wrote in his comment form...)

"I want to say thank you"

And gave me a hug.

I was touched.

I want to say thank you too.

"My mother wants me to tell you that I have ADHD."

My student, PK, he told me this on the 2nd day of a 3 day workshop.

By then, I already knew he is one even if he did not inform me.

He annoyed me so much that I told him to write me an essay of 50 words to explain why he cannot behave himself in class.

And he wrote this...



Initially, his reason was...I have ADHD...

Then I ask him, what is the real reason...WHY? as in...yes he has ADHD...but what makes him want to walk around the class to disturb people and cannot stop annoying people...

He wrote the last line on the paper.

"I feel lonely."

I regretted what I did a while ago in class...

I yelled at him from across the classroom to stop him hurting his classmates,
and to shut him up at one point when my blood really boils.

By saying it nicely to him is useless.

After the horrible experience on the second day especially when my colleague came and saw how disorganise the class was...thanks to PK, I felt totally exhausted.

Third day which was also the last, I collected evaluation forms from the students.

And PK wrote in his comment about me,
"she is alright but she can do better if she...did not shout"

I was totally sadden by his comment.

I wish I don't have to shout too.

I feel bad. Maybe there are better ways to stop him. But I was too angry to think.

But I am thankful for his comment. which on the last day serve as my best reason to ask him to cooperate in class.

Everytime he acted up...
I will tell him...
I will be nice to you if you are nice to me.
If you want me to treat you nicely, then you have to treat me nicely first.

It works in the end.

The last day of workshop end in peace with only tiny hiccups.

He was a good boy on the third day and we become friends.

I genuinely wanted to help him.
Only when he is willing to let me.

He did.

He painted patiently finally for the last 2 pieces of works.
I praise him for his good work.

Almost towards the end of the day when we are already good friends...
At one point, he came to me whispering in my ear...

"Miss Shiah, I want to tell you a secret. My father almost become artist. But he gave up being an artist to marry my mother."

I smile.

I hope this is not the last time I used this Laptop to blog.

WTH...

My laptop...is so old...usually I will this loud...spinning of fan...from my laptop...
Which is the cooling unit...
Eversince the last crash...it was spinning ever more loudly...and somehow...slower...
from the noise it makes I concluded...

And you know what?

I suddenly feel my laptop heating up real fast on my lap...
AND TO MY HORROR...

Pressing my ear on my laptop...
I HEAR...
SILENCE.

Which means...the cooling unit STOP.

WTH.

Though this laptop is still working...
But...I should shut it down soon to prevent over heating.

Fingers crossed.

Thank you being with me thick and thin.
Thank you so much.
Please hang on.
I will not give up on you as long as you don't give out on me.

Thank you.

Envy envy...

I can't draw.
That is why I am a sculptor.

I always envy people who can draw.
Those cartoon illustration.

I wish I can.

Maybe I should illustrate to illustrate that I can't illustrate.

Honestly...some of my students draw better than me.

How depressing...

End of the world.

Yes.

We all know that the world will come to an end sooner or later.

At this current rate.

And so I ask my dear friend YH what kind of dying scenerio would she choose.

1) To be stuck and die in a rubble due to earthquake.
2) To be drown by water because of Tsunami.
3) To fall sick due to disease cause by polluted water source and lack of medication.
4) To die of hunger, shortage of food.
5) To die of SARS.
6) To die of sudden atomic bombing.
7) To die of terrorist attack.

In the end, we couldn't come out with any good choices.

Because, we both agree.

We are not ready to die yet.

But who is?

Cherish what you have now.

And live everyday as if it is your last.

Though I doubt I can do that.

I just slept away my afternoon doing nothing.

That could be a sin from now.

MAC vs PC ROUND 2

I switch on my laptop...but 5 minutes later..
It blacked out.

I know the days of my laptop are numbered...
But I do not want to give up.

Like recovering from stroke...
Though my laptop survive from the last crash...
It was never like the same old laptop I had before.
It was slow..and retarded...
And hangs more frequently.


I need to decide what I want quick.
I still couldn't decide whether I should get a Mac or PC...
I thought I have made the decision of getting a Toshiba a few weeks ago...
After weighting all the pros and cons...
But then...after my laptop survive the ordeal..
And i reloaded all the programmes..
I realise how shity MS is...
I was constantly being prompt to update and patch up...
constantly being threaten by MS of risk if I use pirated XP...
Blah blah...
If MS is complete and effcient like Mac
to provide neccessary software without all the extra cost...
Why would anyone resort to piracy after spending a few thousand for a laptop.
Who would like to put our laptop at risk if we had a better choice.
And I paid for the genuine when I bought the laptop...just that it crashed and the original recovery disk DID NOT MANAGE TO REVIVE IT.
Is that my fault?

I am pissed.
More pissed when I am being threaten by MS for "protection fees" to get genuine stuff or my laptop will be at risk.

I am seriously opting for a MAC this time round.
Seriously.

But the only thing that deter me now is the cost and different operating system...

Thinking really hard now.

Happy Haig Girls!

So damn hot...

I am referring to the weather.

So much so that...I did not realise the water heater was off when I was bathing this afternoon.

Usually I will squeal and wrap myself in towel to get out of the bathroom to switch on the water heater (the switch is outside) even if i am cover with soap.

Today...I bath...and thought the water is cool and refreshing...

Was going to such off the water heater when I am done...and realise...

It was off.

It only shows that the weather is damn hot now...

And oohhh....I love my cold water bath in such weather.

The perfect man.

I am currently watching "Bad couple" a korean drama which tells the story of a woman who wants to have a baby but not willing to get married.
Because she believe that man are not trustworthy.
She found a perfect man and try means to seduce him just to "fertilise" her but did not want to marry him.
In the end, the smart and handsome, sincere and shy guy...
fell in love with her.

A very wacky and hilarious...yet touching drama.
Very relevent to my life...and...yet
It depresses me.

Because I know.
In reality, there is no such man.

Such a cruel drama to me.
Yet a good show to catch.

Nevertheless, it does me no harm to fantasize just for a little while more...until the show ends.

Life...

is so fragile yet...so strong.

...with all the news about the Sichuan earthquake.
Suddenly, I have an urge to let someone know that I have forgiven him.

I have move on. But I did not let know him that I have.

Maybe it is time.

Just a little bit more time.

Life is only so short.

AT least spent more time to love than hate.

HoT hOt HOt...

My room...is in such a wrong position in fengshui term
that it feels like an oven...trapping heat from the afternoon sun.
The temperature difference can be felt by just walking out of my room...
It is so hot until...
I dun feel like doing anything.

It may sound like an excuse.
It is.
But it is also true.

Hello!

More mushrooms!

My LOvely ChongFu Kids...

My St. Steph boys...

Abstract Expressionist

How interesting...
By my Primary 1 student.

This cat...

I was brushing my teeth one morning...
while I heard my nanny talking to someone outside the house.
Her tone of voice...
sounded like she is scolding some naughty kids playing in the corridor...

Curious...
I went to check who she was talking to...

This cat.

"I will throw you into the rubbish chute..!"

"Ask people to catch you and lock you up!"

My nanny threatened...
As if the cat understand.

The cat just meow.

I ask my nanny if this is the first time she saw the cat.

To my surprise, according to my nanny the cat always stand at the corridor and meow to my nanny in the morning when she is having her morning coffee.
This is however the first time I saw the cat, because I always left before my nanny woke up.
Or is still sleeping when my nanny is having breakfast.

The interesting thing is...

Despite the fact that my nanny hate cats and dogs...
and is actually scolding the cat...

I think my nanny likes the cat.

And...

I suspect the cat...kind of like my nanny too.


Just a feeling.